I never thought I'd allow myself to be in such an undefined transition with a professional vacancy as this, but that's probably because nobody mentioned how euphoric it can actually be. Of course, the logistical headaches like losing your benefits and a fat, consistent paycheck can take their toll, but ultimately, it all boils down to what the epic TV series Friends so poignantly identifies as the fear:
Rachel: I'm training to be better at a job that I hate. My life officially sucks.
Joey: Look Rach, wasn't this supposed to a temporary thing? I thought you wanted to do fashion stuff?
Rachel: Well, yeah! I'm still pursuing that.
Chandler: How... exactly are you pursuing that? Ya know, other than sending out resumes like, what, two years ago?
Rachel: Well, I'm also sending out.... good thoughts.
Joey: If you ask me, as long as you got this job, you've got nothing pushing you to get another one. You need the fear.
Rachel: The fear?
Chandler: He's right, if you quit this job, you then have motivation to go after a job you really want.
Rachel: Well then how come you're still at a job that you hate, I mean why don't you quit and get "the fear?"
(Chandler and Joey both start laughing)
Chandler: Because, I'm too afraid
Joey: Look Rach, wasn't this supposed to a temporary thing? I thought you wanted to do fashion stuff?
Rachel: Well, yeah! I'm still pursuing that.
Chandler: How... exactly are you pursuing that? Ya know, other than sending out resumes like, what, two years ago?
Rachel: Well, I'm also sending out.... good thoughts.
Joey: If you ask me, as long as you got this job, you've got nothing pushing you to get another one. You need the fear.
Rachel: The fear?
Chandler: He's right, if you quit this job, you then have motivation to go after a job you really want.
Rachel: Well then how come you're still at a job that you hate, I mean why don't you quit and get "the fear?"
(Chandler and Joey both start laughing)
Chandler: Because, I'm too afraid
Well folks, I went out and got myself the fear, and I must say it tastes pretty good. This is the taste of movement, this middle ground where things are unknown and guarantees are not given, this is where the work is done and growth results. I've been propelled into this uberproductive yet somehow simultaneously restful place. I feel more at peace with myself and my decisions, and more congruent with my priorities than I have in a very long time, and this- all in the absence of pragmatic responsibility. I have moved on from a fantastic job because it had become painfully obvious that it was a terrible fit for my strengths and passions, and for that, I couldn't be prouder.
In this time of empty space, loose-laid days, and sleeping in, I've begun the most aggressive pursuit of what matters most to me, and I don't think I've ever been so thrilled to be smack in the middle of that vicious and glorious place called uncertainty.
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